You took it all, but I’m still breathing.

Song of the day: Sia – Alive

I was listening to this song on the bus today and the way Sia sings this is just so full of emotion and she sounds like she is putting all of herself into the song. When I first heard Sia I have to admit it took me a while to get used to her voice but the song itself is beautiful and I do think she writes some incredible songs and since she has been making her own  way I have enjoyed listening to her stuff.

Today’s Thoughts: 

Things have gotten a little bit more interesting for me the past few days and this week is going to be hectic!! Last Friday I went to visit my grandma to watch some of the TV she had saved for me on her Tevo box and I got a phone call from a shop to go for an interview – so that is where I have been today. I was so nervous but it turned out to be a really short and nice interview – so I really shouldn’t have spent the whole weekend worried and nervous but hey anxiety does that to you. I will find out on Friday if I have the job but i’m really hoping so because I think I would really like it there and although the position is temporary, I think it will help having a bit of extra cash.

Tomorrow I am going to be at the hairdressers for most of the day as Sally-Anne is going to dye my hair – think I want to go for a more autumn colour this time. I am then off with my brother to go to a college open evening so I can ask about the journalism course. It will be weird if we both decide to go at the same time as he is younger then me but I think it could be cool (just got to remember not to cramp his style). Then on Wednesday I am off on an adventure to see a friend and I can’t wait. I can’t believe my life goes from having basically nothing happening to everything happening at once!

As for the weekend just gone; I spent most of it playing Stardew Valley and preparing for this week.

I hope everyone had a good weekend!! Thanks for reading 🙂

What Can Make Tomorrow Better: 

• Get a good night sleep as I am really tired now.
• Go food shopping.
• Relax.

Today’s Positive Photo: 

Funny faces with Stu.

My October Goals.

This blog post I thought I would step away from the autumn themes to write a quick post about my goals for this month. I think it is important to have goals for every month and writing them down is a good way to stop the mind from getting too cluttered and busy with them and sort them out so they can be achieved.

• Find a job – Hopefully a part time job but something to get us some extra money over Christmas and relieve some pressure from Stu.
• Go on an adventure/test myself – I am hoping to visit a friend next week which will require me getting a bus and a train!! I am super scared but also really excited!!
• Finish my cross stitch – I have been working on this pattern since last month now and I am itching to see the final results but also don’t want to rush it.
• Be more mindful – I feel like this has been an ongoing struggle for me throughout the year but I am determined to be more mindful and not sit all the time completely lost in thought.
• Watch some scary films with Stu – I want to make sure we get in some scary films before Halloween to get me in the spirit of things!
• Get a sale on my Etsy – I need to market better and really find the right people to make some sales on my Etsy. I think this would also make my grandma very happy!
• learn as much on Skillshare as I can – my two months free trial runs out in November so I really need to get watching and learning as I wont be able to afford it when my trial is up.
• Buckle down on my driving Theory – I need to get this down so I can do the test and pass it!

These are my October goals, I would love to hear yours too in the comments below 🙂

 

Happiness hit her, like a train on a track.

Song of the day: Florence + The Machine – Dog Days Are Over.  

Yesterday whilst me and Stu were cooking we listened to most of the old Florence + The Machine albums. I had forgotten how much I loved her singing and how much most of her music defined my teenage years.

Today’s Thoughts: 

Yesterday after I wrote my journal post, I did my usual exercise routine, had a shower and then cross stitched until I sat back at the computer to write my Blogtober post. I then did the chores before Stu go home from work. After Stu had rested for a bit we decided to make a big batch of bacon lasagne for dinner and to freeze some. It took ages but it was lovely in the end! We then played Keep Talking and Nobody Explodes – I had the manual and Stu was sitting at the PC. It is such a cool game but rather addicting and we got to bed a lot later then we wanted and I was still really awake so I read some of my book before drifting off. I am reading The Green Mile by Stephen King I have been meaning to read it for a long time and my Mama gave me a copy before she moved so I thought what better time to read it then in October – spooky month. 😛

Today I mostly been catching up on blog posts and comments etc and drinking coffee. I have my driving lesson at 11.15 so I need to get ready for that and after I hope to get some theory work done and write my Blogtober post up for today! Hopefully I can fit some more cross stitching is as this pattern is taking me longer then I expected but we do go to Stu’s parents for dinner on Thursdays so I may not get chance.

What Can Make Tomorrow Better: 

• Ace my driving lesson.
• Get some driving theory practised.
• Get an earlier night.

Today’s Positive Photo: 

My Candyfloss skull candle I got from Ember Candle Co. One of my favourites.

 

 

I wanna be 10 again, just me and Sonic, and nobody telling me I should be more than I am.

Song of the day: Raleigh Ritchie – Time In A Tree 

This music video and song honestly needs more views. Time In A Tree was recommended to me by YouTube on Sunday and I have been listening to it ever since. This songs lyrics hit me so hard. Raleigh Richie definitely made a new fan over here.

Today’s Thoughts: 

I had all the intentions of writing a journal entry yesterday evening but just found my self too distracted by cross stitch! I also got some messages from my mum yesterday the only way she can contact me is through Facebook messages as I have blocked her from all other avenues of my life. The messages really put me in a funny mood as we don’t tend to talk anymore and I haven’t seen her in years, so it is always hard to talk to her but she is very ill so I feel guilty if I don’t interact, she may have caused me pain in the past but she is still my mum and still worry about her. Other then that not much happened yesterday except me writing my second Blogtober post, me and Stu went food shopping and I looked and applied for some more jobs. No news from anything yet but I know I need to give it some time.

Today I have already done half an hours search on job websites and applied to one more but after that it was all job ads for ones I had already seen. I have wrote out my goals for today, had my breakfast and that is it, I want to do more cross stitching today, hopefully get the most of it if not all of it done and I also want to take some time to do more Skillshare lessons as I spent some time on there yesterday but not as much as I would have liked. I also need to write today’s Blogtober post which will be – Things I hate about Autumn.

What Can Make Tomorrow Better: 

• Get my exercise routine in.
• Pick a new hair colour.
•  Make a big batch of bacon Lasagne.

Today’s Positive Photo:

Having cream tea with Stu on his birthday all the way back in March.

 

 

Lately, I’ve been, I’ve been thinking I want you to be happier.

Song of the day: Marshmello ft. Bastille – Happier 

This song is so lovely and it instantly is stuck in my head whenever I hear it. I love Bastille!! I wouldn’t recommend watching the video if you are like me though – it had me crying quite a bit.

Today’s Thoughts: 

I hope everyone had a great weekend! Unfortunately I didn’t end up doing anything I planned to in my last blog post but instead wasted my time playing games and watching TV! but I don’t feel bad about it really. I have had a lot to think about recently so I think its nice to let my brain zombie for a bit (at least that’s the excuse I am going with)

After another pretty lazy weekend playing video games, today I have been rather busy. Earlier on today I wrote my post about September. I have written up a plan for this months Blogtober (I will be writing the introduction to that right after this post), I have also written up a plan for some other blogs I am wanting to write about so it looks like I am set to be pretty busy on the writing front this month!

I have also been looking at part time and seasonal work and applying to what I can I have got to be honest it hasn’t been the most fun of exercises and I am completely out of practise when it comes to filling in forms. I am just looking forward to having a bit of extra money to go explore more places and that'[s what is pushing me to apply to things.

Other then that I think for the rest of my day I will focus on writing my introduction to Blogtober down and getting some chores done then I might just treat myself to a bit of a rest.

What Can Make Tomorrow Better:

• Cut and file my nails as they are looking terrible.
• Get some chores done.
• Apply to at least 2 more jobs.

Todays Positive Photo: 

Wheatley trying to stop me from writing this morning. 

September.

September feels like it has been a weird one for me. Certain decisions and ideas have popped up in life that I have had to make. So certain things that I want to give more attention to generally such as blogging have taken the back burner a bit. but I am here now! so lets do a September run down! 🙂

Cross Stitching:

I have done tons of cross stitching this past month. I made a lovely cross stitch of some roses for Stu’s grandmas birthday present which we put in a little frame for her. I was really happy with it. We just recently got a printer so I have also been searching for patterns and as I mentioned in a previous Post I have been following a pattern made by Cross Stitch Quest. I love stitching because it is so relaxing and I think it has really helped with this months anxieties.

 

TV Shows: 

I watched loads of great TV series whilst cross stitching. The first I completed was Bates Motel. At first I was worried that it would be terrible as I remember how bad the lead actor – Freddie Highmore was in Charlie and the Chocolate Factory (That didn’t stop it from being one of my favourite films when I was younger) but it turned out to be fantastic. The acting was brilliant, the setting fantastic and the story great. Norman was creepy but not to a point it wasn’t believable and at points you do feel sorry for him. I loved every moment of this show and I was very sad when it ended 😛 I am hoping to watch psycho soon and I would also love to read the book now as well.

I also completed watching American Horror Story Cult which I had very mixed feelings about. I have loved pretty much every season of AHS but this one to me seemed to be very um try hard? I know AHS is very over the top by nature and I really liked the premise for this season but I don’t know through out watching I couldn’t help but cringe at certain moments and sometimes the story just didn’t add up. Like I said I loved the premise and the characters all in all were very well fleshed out but I just don’t feel it was up to standard with some of the greatest series of AHS. To be fair though I might just be hating because it starred Lena Dunham and I can’t stand her.

The third thing I completed watching is the second series of American Vandal – this is a mockumentry show that makes fun of the normal documentary you would usually get on Netflix. It is hilarious – very childish at times but hilarious and so well executed. I don’t really want to spoil anything here so that is all I am going to say.

Other then that me and Stu have been obsessed with watching old Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmares UK and Jelle’s Marble runs on YouTube. Oh also RT Gaming streams on Twitch, hes such an upbeat and funny person.

Visiting Stu’s Grandmas:

This September was Grandma Brown’s birthday so we went up towards Yorkshire to see her and Grandma Mayhew. Other members including Stu’s auntie and cousins were there as well so we had a little party at her house on the Saturday. Grandma Brown is very into crafting so I had plenty to talk to her about. I can’t help but feel a little anxious about family meet ups but as the evening went on I did find myself relaxing more.

On the Sunday we went to see Grandma Mayhew, she is very old now so she stays at home a lot of the time and has to have carers visit her regularly unfortunately her mind is not very good and she forgets things very easily. I know this was going to be a hard visit for Stu but she was actually a lot better then I first expected and although she would get confused easily by different things she seemed in good spirits and to be cracking jokes so that was nice to see. Below is a cute picture of Stu and his Grandma Brown.

Comfort Food:

This month has been all about comfort food. Near the start of the month we made a massive pot of stew – the recipe I got from my step mum and is one of my favourites growing up – it has been the perfect meal to warm us up in the colder evenings. As we made a big pot as well we still have one portion left for this week!  For breakfast in September I have been mainly having porridge with banana and honey again this is a lovely warming comfort food.  I have also been loving Ice gems – We had a big bumper pack of them so they have been a great daily snack.

Video Games:

I haven’t actually been playing a lot of different video games on my own this month. Of course I have still been playing The Sims 4 but that is it really it. I have been playing plenty of games with Stu though such as the very relaxing Stardew Valley – what is so great about owning your own little farm together? I don’t know but I love it. Two player A Hat In Time a 3D platformer with some great levels and characters – we have had some problems with this crashing but I have enjoyed what we have played. We have also picked Sea of Thieves back up and we are really enjoying playing pirates and fighting skeletons.

Mindfulness Plain and Simple: 

I haven’t completely finished this book yet but I have been enjoying learning a bit more in-depth about Mindfulness. This book by Oli Doyle I picked up for cheap from The Works has been sitting on my shelf for a while and I just kept putting it off because to be honest I didn’t have many expectations for it. I have really enjoyed it so far and it has plenty of mindfulness exercises included inside to practise. The book focuses on how living in the now and not thinking too much about the future or getting lost in the past is good for us and I have really been trying to put more of these exercises into my life as I know I am very easily lost in thoughts. My problems with this book is that sometimes it does have moments where I want to roll my eyes – but I think this is down to the practise rather then the author and it can be a bit repetitive. But so far it has been very interesting and something I do want to apply to my life.

Walks Outside:

Much like last month I have took loads of walks across the park nearby my flat this September and I have loved doing it even though sometimes it has rained on me!! It has become more of a regular thing for me to do and I do think it improves my mind to get out of the flat even if I am not doing anything and even if I am not walking by the most beautiful sights!

Alexa:

Stu got a new phone and they gave him a free Amazon Echo Dot. We were both funny about keeping it because we were kinda worried about it listening to us at all times but to be honest we both love it now. Its great! Especially when I want to listen to music whilst say washing up so I don’t have to manually skip a track. I have to admit Alexa is still a little creepy but I don’t mind her being round now 😛

Decisions:

Like I said at the start of this post I have had many decisions to make this month mostly to do with the future and the near future. I have decided that I will most probably start a college course next year. As that is my decision I think it is best I find myself a part time job to help out with the bills and make sure we have a little bit of extra money to spend on ourselves and on upcoming Christmas. This has been a hard decision for me as I assumed that when I left the Co-op I would have a more solid and secure idea that I would be putting into practise now and the thought of interviews make me very scared but I think it is for the best.

So that was my September, I hope everyone had a brilliant month!! Here’s hoping for a great October. 😀

 

But uh-oh, I love her because she moves in her own way.

Song of the day: The Kooks – She Moves In Her Own Way. 

I love a good upbeat song to listen to on a Saturday morning and The Kooks are just right for that this morning. A bit of a nostalgia trip again in terms of how much I used to listen to this all the way back in 2006 – but still a great song.

Today’s Thoughts: 

Good morning everyone! I didn’t post yesterday as I was too busy cleaning the flat and being a domestic goddess 😛 Today it is really sunny out, but really crisp and cold which is really refreshing actually. We have just taken the car to the garage for them to look at a puncture and walked back and although it was just back through the housing estates it was a lovely walk.

I haven’t any set in stone plans for this weekend yet but I would love to do something as I don’t really want another complete lazy weekend – as great as they are I think it sets us up bad for the rest of the week – I don’t know why that is. I know I want to spend some more time on cross-stitching and writing up ideas for this blog as I haven’t even written anything down yet my ideas are just floating round in my head but other then that I have no other plans.

I Hope everyone has a lovely weekend. 🙂

What Can Make Tomorrow Better: 

• Practise some mindfulness.
• Keep flat tidy.
• Not spending my whole day playing The Sims 4 like I know I want to. 😛

Today’s Positive Photo: 

A snap of some of my grandmas flowers in her garden. I just thought they looked so pretty.

 

I’ve dreamt about you nearly every night this week.

Song of the day: Arctic Monkeys – Do I wanna know? 

I have to really be in a certain mood to listen to this song and album as it reminds me of a time I was a very different version of my self. That sounds really weird when read out but I know what I mean. That being said I still adore this song and that guitar riff is just brilliant.

Today’s Thoughts: 

So I took a bit of a break from writing in fact the last time I wrote on this page was the 17th, oops!! I don’t really know why that is. I kept thinking about sitting down and writing and then would just get distracted by something else. I am back now though and I am hoping to create/write some different things along with my usual journal style blogs. I am hoping I can come with a schedule for myself at the end of the month so watch out for that!

So what have I been doing whilst not writing? Well Cross Stitching mainly. I am currently trying to complete the Gravity Falls gnome puking a beautiful rainbow following this pattern by Cross Stitch Quest. I have always loved cross stitching from when I was first learning to sew, if I could I would just cross stitch the rest of my days away 😛

We went up to Yarm, near Yorkshire last weekend to go see Stu’s grandmas and family. It was nice for Stu to see his grandmas because he lives so far away he barely gets to interact with them. I impressed Grandma Brown with my needle felting skills and it was nice to stay somewhere different to home to be honest especially because I know we aren’t likely to get a holiday this year.

Other then that I have been looking after Stu the last two days as he has had to have time off work with migraines. Continuing with my driving lessons – which is actually going rather well and thinking up ideas for my current Etsy but also new ideas based around my love of cross stitching and making stuff. I am really set on working for myself now and I really want to work hard and push for something to stick. Wish me luck!

What can make tomorrow better: 

• Do some more market research into Etsy.
• Set out plans for different blog posts.
• Clean my messy flat.

Today’s Positive Photo: 

Wheatley in his favourite place … a box.

Wishing to be the friction in your jeans.

Song of the day: Fall Out Boy – Sugar, we’re goin’ down

What can I say, it is just a classic. An anthem for any early on hardcore fans of Fall out Boy and it makes me feel really, really nostalgic.

Today’s Thoughts: 

I had all the intentions of writing here yesterday but then I got too distracted by messing around and changing my theme and adding some share buttons that I completely forgot to even write a blog. I had a very relaxing day yesterday mostly just cross stitching and watching Bates Motel. I also signed up to skillshare  for two free months just to see if I can learn a couple of new things and helps with my writing, Etsy store etc. but I haven’t actually started any of the lessons yet. Like I said I was mostly distracted by cross stitching, but it was nice really.

Today I plan on finishing said cross stitch and I have been promising myself cookies all week so I think I will bake some of them today. I will probably go visit my grandma as well. I have hurt my side from doing a longer exercise routine yesterday so I think I will probably just take it a bit easier today – maybe do some stretches.

Let me know what you think of the new blog theme – I felt like I needed a change. Have a good weekend everyone!!

What Can Make Tomorrow Better: 

• Start on Skillshare.
• Finish my Cross Stitch.
• Do some yoga.

Today’s Positive Photo: 

I caught Wheatley yawning and its just hilarious.

 

 

 

Don’t you forget about me.

Song of the day: Simple Minds – Don’t you forget about me.  

This song is the soundtrack to The Breakfast Club a film I hold dear to my heart as it is one of mine and my best friends (Liz) favourite films to watch. I love just how this song sounds so 80’s yet it doesn’t feel dated. One of the best songs to sing along to ever.

Today’s Thoughts: 

Yesterday I got everything uploaded to Etsy which actually took me quite a bit of time, but I am happy that it is all set up now. I just have to figure my way round the marketing now…. hey if you are looking for a cute handmade quilt here is a link! After sorting that I did my exercise routine, had a shower and then went for a walk and posted a couple of things for Ebay. I then came home and worked on the chores and cross-stitched for a bit.

I have been feeling a lot more calm recently and I think it is because I am trying to reach out to people more often and I am taking time to practise more mindfulness. Mindfulness is something I have struggled with a lot because I find myself so distracted by all my thoughts – but I have been trying really hard and I really think it is having a positive impact.

Today I am looking to finish my cross-stitch (it is for a birthday present) and work on some more creative things before tonight. When Stu gets home I got myself some learners insurance so I can go out and practise in the car with him. Funny enough I don’t feel too nervous about that which I thought I would be. I mostly feel excited to be taking the steps to getting my drivers licence.

What Can Make Tomorrow Better:

• Share the Etsy around.
• Eat more fruit.
• Go for a walk.

Today’s Positive Photo: 

Me sitting somewhere in the Peak district earlier this year.